“If you could just step up a bit to bridge the gap...” said at least once a day by different care providers. I’m getting a lot of practice stating my boundaries: “No, there is no more, I’m already operating beyond my energy envelope.” Ironic that dealing with the guilt also takes a lot of energy, but not as much as being a perpetual bridge provider.
So often they don't even ask, they just assign tasks with the assumption that you'll make it work. The most important step in opting out is even realizing that it's something you can do! And, as you've hit on, the next most important thing is to remember that all you're doing is recognizing your limits. They make it so hard!
They only began asking after I started saying I wouldn’t be able to take on the task they were assigning. The care of elders (& others) runs on assumptions: there’s a woman who will make herself available and who is capable and willing to do everything needed. I suspect if I had been a son the hospital would have pushed harder for residential aged care as the next step. But I don’t know.
“If you could just step up a bit to bridge the gap...” said at least once a day by different care providers. I’m getting a lot of practice stating my boundaries: “No, there is no more, I’m already operating beyond my energy envelope.” Ironic that dealing with the guilt also takes a lot of energy, but not as much as being a perpetual bridge provider.
So often they don't even ask, they just assign tasks with the assumption that you'll make it work. The most important step in opting out is even realizing that it's something you can do! And, as you've hit on, the next most important thing is to remember that all you're doing is recognizing your limits. They make it so hard!
They only began asking after I started saying I wouldn’t be able to take on the task they were assigning. The care of elders (& others) runs on assumptions: there’s a woman who will make herself available and who is capable and willing to do everything needed. I suspect if I had been a son the hospital would have pushed harder for residential aged care as the next step. But I don’t know.