Did you catch the chatter about how weird and morbid it was that there was a plan in place for when Queen Elizabeth died?
It's funny how much death is a forbidden topic. We're a society that loves to plan for things, just as long as we don't acknowledge that death exists. There are plans in place for the death of any powerful person. Governments and corporations don't like to fly by the seat of their pants. Even for those of us who are neither famous nor powerful, death triggers a cascade of legal and practical issues that need to be dealt with. It’s hard to deal with critical details when you’re grieving.
Birth and death are universal experiences. Disability is pretty nearly universal. How are we so alone in these experiences? How can we be so unprepared and unsupported? The New York Times has a piece that's officially about how the maternal instinct is a myth, which also touches on just how alone people feel as they navigate parenthood.
We're not alone. We were never alone. There’s nothing particularly unique about these human experiences.
Not everyone is ready to talk about these things — the emotions or the practical details. Many of us are.
How has the awareness of mortality changed your daily life?
Plenty of philosophers would have us believe that it’s the finite nature of life that makes it valuable. If we had endless days, each one would be less valuable.
When we live in denial of death are our days less valuable? Do we more easily forget what matters to us? Do we slip into lives of routine rather than meaning?
My mom would never ever discuss death or planning for death, she would cry or become very emotional. When she developed Alzheimer's and was in a nursing home, my dad and I preplanned/prepaid everything for my mom and him. Years earlier I had to bring them to an attorney to have a Wills and POAs/Health Care Proxy's in place. My dad ended up passing before my mom, but all was in place and it made the process easier. Again, when my mom passed the process was so much easier. As I am single and of a certain age, I just prepaid my funeral and I am putting together all of my paperwork. I look at the process as part of life and it will take the burden off of anyone else.