The most popular new year's resolutions center on weight loss. That's not great.
I know, you're doing it for your health. Well, the data suggesting weight loss is good for your health falls apart under any scrutiny. Even if we had fantastic data proving people with high BMIs were at greater risk of illness and disease, we'd still lack any proof that losing weight reduces that risk. And there's no diet or exercise routine out there that's been shown to lead to long-term weight loss. What we do have is a lot of data showing that people regain all the weight they lost...and then gain some more. If diets lead to long-term weight gain, you may as well skip them!
I can't help but notice that anything bad that happens to a fat person is blamed on their weight, while we don't hold people responsible for their sports injuries. Sports and exercise are the cause of tremendous numbers of emergency room visits, surgeries, permanent disabilities, and deaths. We don't blame illnesses on a lifetime of weight cycling and fad diets.
Life is not a morality tale. Disability is not a punishment for our bad choices. Let’s let go of the myth of a tidy cause and effect. Life is not fair.
You know what's good for your health? Spending time with friends and family. Maybe while gardening, cooking, and eating. Maybe while going for a walk or watching the sunset. Maybe while curled up on the couch watching movies.
My experience has shown me that there are lots of fat people out there in loving relationships, surrounded by community, leading lives that are fulfilling. Weight and size just aren’t that relevant, even with the issues of fatphobia. You don’t need to be skinny to have a meaningful life.
I don't have any data to back this up, but I'm pretty confident that centering our lives on our own self loathing isn't good for us. So many people seem to approach their diet and exercise routines as a way to punish and control themselves.
Exercise and healthy eating aren't inherently bad, it's fatphobia that makes them problematic. Some people find great satisfaction in the gym. They gain a sense of control through tracking their macros. They have a community around running. They're chasing after the carrot, not running from the stick. Weight loss is not the reward.
What are we really chasing with our weight loss resolutions? For a resolution that's good for you, embrace the goal that’s driving the desire for weight loss, not the weight loss.
Maybe you're looking for a way to...
...build community
...regain trust in your body
...get in touch with your primal self
...gain a feeling of mastery
...reduce anxiety
...find joy
...quiet your mind
...spend more time with your kids
...see yourself making progress
...feel sexy
...get in touch with a past version of yourself
...get out of the house every day
...carve out time for yourself
Letting go of weight loss resolutions is the first step to noticing and honoring what's important to you.
After writing this, I came across The Atlantic asking if sports are worth the health risks.
If you want some suggestions on what to aim for, Tina Roth Eisenberg has you covered.
Let 2023 be the year of disabled joy.
Garrett Bucks has a set of questions to ask ourselves in this new year:
Do we have a story to tell about the past year that isn’t just our own story, but our community’s story?'
If so, who helped shape it?
If not, what does that loneliness feel like?
Do we really live in a place— a place with neighbors, a place with contradictory, interconnected, human stories— or are we just shadowboxing?
I'm a long-time Heather Havrilesky fan girl, so here's a very long quote:
“There’s no hourglass running out. No alarm will go off if you don’t learn everything in time or win all of the awards quickly. No one is watching and measuring. No one holds a secret key to happiness. Success doesn’t make everything perfect in every way.
Our job is to luxuriate in the present. Everything good starts there.
In the moments that we’re luxuriating in the present the most, that’s when we’re the most special. Why? Because we’re letting the divine beauty of this world show itself to us. Because we’re open to the people around us. Because when we’re fully present, we’re smarter and more full of love than at any other time we’re alive.
Presence makes us special because only when we’re completely present can we see other people clearly and love them for who they are with all of our hearts. That love transforms us into something brighter and bigger, when we feel it. It makes other people brighter and bigger when they feel it and let it in.
Being present makes it possible to love other people the way they deserve to be loved. It also makes it possible to love (and respect and honor) yourself the way you deserve to be loved and respected and honored. When you’re fully present, you can set aside the trippy, anxious measurements of our short-sighted culture and see yourself for what you are. You can feel, in your cells, how incredibly lucky you are to be here.”
Of course I thought about all the apps and digital systems tracking PCAs, home health aides, and nursing home staff when reading this review of a book about how digital surveillance made trucking worse for drivers and more dangerous for everyone.
Interested in becoming more deeply involved with mutual aid and racial justice? The Barnraisers Project is enrolling a new cohort for weekly calls. If you want to do something and you’re not ready for a big commitment, Caring Across Generations always has small ways to participate in activism to ensure expanded access to care and fight for care workers.